Your Mileage May Vary

Early in this episode, Keith baits Mike into a fairly long and complete heteronormative verbal screed. This doesn't meant it's wrong; it's right. There aren't many folks out there with direct access to the light of Truth. For musical rivals Prince and Michael Jackson, Truth came from some guy named Jehovah. For Mike, it boils down to cultural artifacts passed down throughout all of human history. That out of the way, we tackle a man who, in his late 40s, has discovered he can take on a mistress in her 20s and abandon his wife. This is sort of a 50-50 proposition in the long run, but I can understand the core of his thinking. Should you tell a prospective partner that you have Herpes? I can hear you saying, "Yes!" But what if I told you that virtually everyone has Herpes (except Mike), so telling them this just risks relationship failure without really doing anyone any good? Is omitting this information the better move? And, what should a man do if his female partner makes a sexual request, not once but twice.

If I were a therapist, and a couple came in for counseling, sex would be on the agenda as a topic of conversation. I'd be suspicious if one of the partners completely took it off the table. Before you ask, I am cognizant that, despite Michael Phelps' claims to the contrary, the evidence for the efficacy of most types of therapy is weak. Is there an orgasm reliability threshold below which a typical man would pretty much stop masturbating? Is it reasonable for his female partner to feel "used" if they frequently have sex where he doesn't finish? What really is the difference from her perspective? And, is the new Barbie movie reinforcing outmoded stereotypes, or merely bringing them back into fashion where they belong? Either way, the movie's success hasn't done much for Mattel's stock price. We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://ymmv.me/129/videos https://ymmv.me/129/better https://ymmv.me/129/no-cum

For a man, orgasms are pretty much binary. Sure, there are some tantra afficionados who will tell you that ejaculation and orgasm for a man can be separate and the like. But for most men, they either cum or they don't, and the semen is the proof. For women, the tale of the tape can be quite different. We can all agree that a woman is "faking it" if she receives nothing resembling an orgasm from the act. But what if she has one proper orgasm and then a series of "aftershocks". Should she be accused of faking if the subsequent events are, in her mind, orgasms in their own right? Alongside this, why do men obsess over being able to "make" a woman orgasm. Sure, I can see the allure of her receiving intense pleasure from the same organ that gives you such pleasure (I'm referring to your penis). But, women's pleasure isn't really vicarious in this way. They have their own apparatus to manage. And, as with most things in life, to do it well you must first do it yourself. Can any woman (or man for that matter) seriou

It turns out Keith hasn't had partnered sex in some time, so he's simultaneously adjusting to the situation and looking for a way to change it. Fortunately for us, that probably only serves to increase his interest in discussing sex and relationships. If a woman absolutely doesn't want to take hormonal birth control, what are the reasonable options for them? Is she just in for a lot of semen in her mouth, or does the rhythm method actually work if used very carefully? What makes a sex act gay? Does that even mean anything, or is the real distinction between acts that are more and less dominant and submissive? Does a man wanting to be penetrated in some way suggest something about him? And, what to do if you're in a dead bedroom situation, you try to communicate, your partner listens to YMMV, but there's still no spark? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://ymmv.me/127/two-condoms https://ymmv.me/127/

Back from Europe, Keith offers a way to break the ice with women on a date in a way that gets them talking about things they enjoy discussing. It's a reasonable suggestion, and one that Mike unwittingly deployed recently at the grocery store as well. Keith wants to know if there's anything that an attractive woman can do without being super aggressive that would be a complete turn-off to a man during an early sexual encounter with her. Is repulsion even possible in that situation? If a man is very attracted to a woman, and that woman has a twin sister, will the man be attracted to the twin as well? And, if the man becomes less attracted to his partner for whatever reason, will he start finding the sister more and more attractive? Can this cause relationship problems? Me, I have very little experience with twins. Twinks, sure, but not twins. A woman wants to save her boyfriend's semen as a "souvenir". Another is concerned because her husband has lost sexual interest in her. And a man, in a curiously female-sou

Mike interviews Dr. Ricky Arenson on today's show, a doctor based in Perth who has written a book about heterosexual relationships and hosts his own podcast as well (links below). Given Ricky's status as an endocrinologist, Mike tried quickly to pin him down on the orgasm question. Namely, is there some sort of source of pleasure chemicals in the body which can run out, therefore invalidating people's claims of large numbers of orgasms in quick succession? Sadly, Ricky did not validate Mike's prior, and the reality is a bit more nuanced. Most importantly, we talked about issues affecting typical heterosexual relationships, a topic that can sometimes be drowned out by those who don't view that lifestyle as worthy of discussion. We also discussed such topics as trans people, libido mismatches in relationships and gender differences in what's attractive. And, what impact can testosterone therapy have on male libido? Ricky's book is titled "Women Are Superior To Men" and his podcast is called "Happy Healthy Ever

Keith dials in from Cyprus to tells us a bit about his travels. A bit of everything, including women looking for paid experiences and a dating adventure in Armenia, origin of the lovely Cher and the not-so-lovely Kim Kardashian. Though I told Keith he could ask me questions about my discussion of transexual porn last week, he took a pass on that for now, choosing instead to dive into a number of pressing questions. Namely, we find another situation where Keith believes a woman is just asking for more sexual interest from her partner in a roundabout way. Another's partner keeps losing his erections, but only after having sex with her for several minutes. Is a relationship salvageable if the female partner has been faking orgasms for 14 years? And, should men just ask for oral or does that spoil the mood? Is there a better solution for initiating in relationships? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://

I asked ChatGPT to summarize the podcast, which it did, sort of. It started short-circuiting when I brought up the topic of trans and trans porn. Ironic, given that I wasn't really negative on it at all. It's just a taboo that can't be broken apparently. I tried to stay true to the AI's effort to transcribe in the following, even though it refused at points: In the first segment of the podcast, Mike is hosting alone as Keith is in Armenia. He discusses receiving three French books from Ally, one of which is called "Submission" by Michel Houellebecq, a novel containing some racy content involving a professor and his annual affairs with students, leading to some amusing language learning moments with his French tutor. In the second part, Mike explores the capabilities of GPT-based tools, particularly their ability to predict and generate text in a similar manner to the human brain. He also proposes a gap in the market for AI-generated literotica, and speculates on the potential for AI-generated pornography tai

With Keith still climbing mountains in Georgia (the country, not the state), Ally and Mike tackled some new questions, and Mike delicately but firmly improved the quality of the blowjobs Ally gives to her partner. You're welcome, mystery man! We discuss Mike's efforts at reviewing sex toys, whether men's or women's bodies are objectively more attractive, how Mike first learned about autoerotic asphyxiation and other important personal topics. Ally wanted to know how long a blowjob should take, which is what led Mike to enlighten her broadly on the best oral strategies. A questioner wanted to what's going on with a boyfriend who jerks off at lightning speed, and if it's even possible to pleasure him. Another was curious about whether women experience physical discomfort if they are aroused but don't orgasm. And, we discuss a man and a woman, each of whom wants anal but who has a partner that isn't all that keen on it. It's too bad we can't hook them up with one another. We get a lot of our questions from Redd

With Keith out of town, Ally joins the podcast to bring a woman's perspective to our standard fare of questions. Some women like the "motion of the ocean," while others prefer to be orally satisfied by an insatiable lover. Ally, on the other hand, prefers the "Roller Coaster of Love," opting to be jostled into submission. "I can't manhandle myself, after all," she notes. We descend into a discussion of dirty talk, and I'm not talking about such standard fare as, "Can I play your cello" or "Explain Lie Algebra again to me, please." No, this is the real serious dirty talk that women sometimes need to get themselves going. There's some good detail of what exactly Ally feels when a man ejaculates inside of her. This goes for her vagina and/or her mouth, so a pretty detailed description all-in-all. Ally tells the story of a friend whose partner wanted feet intimately involved in his ejaculatory routine. What surprised me was her friend's willingness to reveal such a situation among friends. And, does it work for w

What kind of a world would we live in if men were subjected to overwhelming social pressure to be more submissive and less career oriented? Would it make them happy? If not, then why is it so surprising that the pressure put on women to be more dominant and career oriented doesn't necessarily make them happier? When a man decides he's going to fully prioritize his female partner's pleasure, is he making a good bet? Or, will she be confused because she is really expecting and wanting him to pursue his own pleasure in the bedroom? Let's say you work late and your wife or girlfriend tells you it's OK if you want to have sex with her while she's sleeping, as long as you don't wake her up. Should you take her up on it? And, is it a genuine offer? And, do women like being called "good girls"? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://ymmv.me/120/good-girl https://ymmv.me/120/priorities https://ymmv.me/120/nymp

We convene today to discuss a topic at least as important as the "debt ceiling" and when AI is going to take your job: What exactly is the purpose of women typically wanting the first scene of the sex act to be them performing oral on the man? This is made especially vital as we have a first-person account of a man whose female partner was angered when he orgasmed during the oral instead of waiting. A man decides to pull out his penis, wipe it off and put it back in, which reminds Mike of Devin The Dude and his well-known song with Dr. Dre, https://ymmv.me/119/fuck-you. He promises to take it out and wipe it off if he's "going too far." Makes sense to me. A woman wants to encourage her man to provide more animalistic sex, and another is complaining that men "change rhythm" when she's close to orgasm. Does it bother women when men have to think of baseball to avoid cumming too soon? And, what's the deal with Keith's sock? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are lin

Most of this episode is dedicated to an in-depth look at how Keith triages potential partners he finds on dating apps. Before you brush it aside, consider that Keith almost certainly has knowledge about this domain that goes past the ordinary man. We discuss various women who come up on one of the popular dating apps for Keith, how he might approach them, and what he thinks of them. There's also talk of general trends he's observed, what works, and what does not. And we discuss Keith's profile and photos as well. Later, we get into a woman who wonders why her partner seeks more "closeness" while she's sitting on his face. And, is it smart for a woman to tell her partner that her vibrator really gets the job done better for her? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://ymmv.me/118/riding https://ymmv.me/118/secrets https://ymmv.me/118/vibrator Twitter: @ymmvpod Facebook: ymmvpod Email: ymmvpod@gmail.com

Does it mean that I'm sheltered that I have no personal experience with people who believe astrology is real? In high school, I knew a young man who believed fervently in evangelical Christianity, so much so that he now leads a well-known southern church as its pastor. But I always imagined that deep down he didn't really believe the things he was saying. The frequency with which Keith purports to encounter such beliefs on dates has me thinking that people really do go for this stuff and don't view it all as parlor tricks. Or, perhaps, as my grandfather said, "You have to believe something." We had what I thought was an interesting discussion about whether it does women any harm at all to make a guy wait for sex. It seems likely to me that it does do women harm to be forced to decide whether to make a relationship sexual after only two or three dates. And I do believe in general that it's the woman's choice. And, does a woman asking for more "animalistic" sex just mean she's not that into the guy? Should a wo

Keith reveals the details of his condom-discussion strategy during dinner with a new partner. It turns out that you can undertake a discussion that simultaneously conveys that you're a reasonable partner and that subtly asks whether sex is on the table that evening. Also, it becomes evident that very few men have such a conversation or behave in a reasonable way around condom use. A discussion ensues about how exactly (other than the obvious) Keith should react when a woman initiates oral sex on him early in a sexual encounter. He's concerned about her expectations for how far he should let things develop before transitioning to PIV sex. And then we transition into the question of whether society views these things fundamentally through the male gaze. Does society consider submissiveness to be problematic? Is giving oral sex inherently embarrassing? Is the prone-bone sex position athletic for the man? What about other positions? And, what does it mean if your partner offers you "free use" of her body for sex?

A lively conversation with Allison, who works with women who are dating after getting out of a long-term relationship. Allison is also an author. Her book, "Find Love Again: Learn how to Date Like A Goddess," penned under the name Allison Jayne, seeks to help women navigate the dating, relationships and sex. According to Allison, essentially no guys offer to use a condom when having sex with a new conquest for the first time. This led Keith to offer what I consider some pretty solid advice for men to turn this to their advantage. Allison also has a healthy sex drive, and she helped us understand the differences between clitoral and internal orgasms. She described how entering the dating pool enabled her to explore her sexuality in a way that wasn't really possible while married. For more information about Allison, you can check out her website, which also contains links to her book: https://ymmv.me/115/allison Twitter: @ymmvpod Facebook: ymmvpod Email: ymmvpod@gmail.com

Well, it's about time we talk about a person with a truly off-the-map sexual experience. In this case, it's a woman who spent many years in amorous relations with her canine buddy. I can't say I've ever felt the desire to be in such a situation, but starting as it did in her younger years, I can understand some level of confusion. And her poor partner who now has to process this information. We discuss in reasonable detail the ins and outs of vasectomies and relationships. It seems like for younger women learning that a partner has had one might be discourage continuing with the relationship. But maybe a sperm bank could operate as a reservoir of good will? And, do men think of clits in a way inverse to how they think about penises? Is better worse? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://ymmv.me/114/dog https://ymmv.me/114/clit https://ymmv.me/114/vasectomy https://ymmv.me/114/bleeding Twitter: @ymmv

We discuss with Celeste Moore her experiences with coaching mid-life men on dating, how men and women approach sexual experiences, and the during and after of working in a strip club. I think the typical assumption is that different people experience dating in more or less the same way. But there's a pretty significant gender gap in how things get experienced. This is particularly true at younger ages, when young women might feel like they can "get away" with anything because there are plenty of fish in the sea, and young men are just trying to navigate the maze to get sex. But, as people age, the tables turn to a significant extent, and maybe what men and women are looking for even begins to look more similar. In my mind, they're both likely looking for membership into exclusive spaces, like the Soho House. Is such a place the same as sugar dating, or is there an important difference? Should people seek partners online or in person? Has dating gone awry? Which reminds me, I went to the Tesla factory the othe

What is there left to say about blowjobs? Keith doesn't like them, but women like giving them. They like that submissive role, giving their man a good safe place to put his semen. What a privilege. How should a woman take it if she clearly is sexually interested in a man and he's not reciprocating? The sad truth is it probably means he's just not seeing a future with you. That categorically does not mean he won't continue to have sex with you occasionally, but it does very likely mean he wont be pursuing much if any of a commitment. What's the right response for a woman who is dating a man who only cums from masturbation? And, how should she respond if he texts her after not being able to cum during partnered sex to tell her that right after she left he had a great orgasm from masturbation? And, should men be embarrassed about premature ejaculation? I know I was sort of embarrassed when I became partially aroused from Keith's description of one such encounter by a questioner. To see Mike's Subreddit, contain

Can hot girls be good at sex? It's certainly possible, though it might also be the case that a less well-endowed female would try harder in the bedroom to impress her partner. What is pretty evident is that prior to getting into bed, women who are more attractive don't have to work as hard to land a partner. We finish up our dissection of the audio and questions sent to us last week by a female friend of the show. Then we move on to discuss whether men using sex toys is (at least somewhat) aberrant. A man wants to know how he can last longer in general, and we discuss the difficulties in that area early in a relationship. And, what is the right set of tongue movements when performing oral on a woman? Should it be random? Rhythmic? Systematic? We get a lot of our questions from Reddit, so for our listeners' enjoyment, here are links to some of the questions we discussed this week: https://ymmv.me/111/toys https://ymmv.me/111/squirting https://ymmv.me/111/lasting-longer https://ymmv.me/111/asking https://ymmv.