Straight Riffin'

Well this was a loud, crazy riff. Humberto pulls no punches and the riff never halts. We discuss the finer points of 80s heavy metal (much to Teddy’s chagrin), funny laughs, typing out laughs in IMs, Jamaica, homophobia, world policy, America, racism, fetish clubs, and much more.

Comedian/Actress Victoria Avalon swings by the House of Riff for pure madness. Teddy’s back in good health, and the energy is high. Both Victoria and Mitcz have “I almost got mugged” stories from a few days prior, we talk about a peculiar craigslist post involving a date going awry and a missing flash drive in a precarious location (which frightens Teddy to no end). Also, an ice cream mascot mistaken for a KKK member, some fascinating research about hallucinogens, and Teddy & Mitcz try their hand at convincing a theoretical girlfriend to agree to a 2-year wedding.

Teddy was out sick, so our good friend Dan Frederickson took over co-hosting duties to sit in with Mitcz and special guest Farhaad. With all-new mics, and our cleanest audio yet – we’re high-quality riffin’. Topics discussed include Lindsay Lohan, Jim Henson, Blossom, embarrassing things we like, the only subject that makes Mitcz uncomfortable, phobias, and much more.

It’s like an alternate universe on this episode of Straight Riffin’, as original co-host Justin Dabuet sits on the other side of the couch and riffs the fuck on with us. Mitcz announces his upcoming EP recording, a new mini-tour is announceed, and pure insanity ensues. Just too much good stuff to write it all here.

Comedian John Basset comes to the House of Riff and the ridiculousness goes off the charts. After a brief discussion of Mitcz’s roofie incident, we focus on CNN’s faux pas of playing Coolio’s “Fantastic Voyage” over a montage of a 103 black woman driving around. This leads to some love for Weird Al (as Teddy says “Weird Al is an institution”) and his recent troubles with annoyingly dramatic Lady Gaga. When a man dressed as Gumby fails in his attempt to rob a San Diego 7-11, Teddy struggles to regain his composure, and we discuss other weird TV of the 80s (of which Mitcz is woefully ignorant about). The show closes out with a dissertation on the insanity of Souljah Boy.

What a wild night of riffin’. It starts with a discussion of Mitcz’s ability to “whiten” any slang, along with brief definitions of hip-hop slang that might confuse people as white as Mitcz. A rudimentary scale of whiteness (“The J. Crew Scale of Whiteness”) is defined. We discuss the potential uprising of the robot rebellion after hearing two Cleverbots interact with each other, and we discuss our varied plans for post-apocalyptic warfare. Sinead O’Connor’s online search for a lover (and her surprising unabashed desire for “the difficult brown”) is discussed. Finally, Teddy has a bittersweet hard first win in a game of Google Feud.

Comedian Alex Hooper came by to sling some riffin’ madness with us and the energy never lets up. We talk about childhood sports, art school, the new Muppet movie, the NAACP, yet another anti-gay GOP official caught in a gay scandal, the importance of accepting people’s lifestyles, Mitcz shares an audio recording he made after someone drugged his drink the other night, and we play another fun-filled round of Google Feud.

Comedian Galloway Allbright swings by the House of Riff for a solid riffin’ session. The show starts with a discussion of a beloved children’s classic – Fraggle Rock – and the shared love we all had for it growing up. Mitcz gets confused about the lyrics to MC Hammer’s “U Can’t Touch This”, leading to Teddy calling him a racist. Mitcz then relates the angriest, most hateful message reply he’s ever received, and his reply to it, while Galloway is in shock that someone could ever be so angry about anythng. Teddy shares a related story about angry, psychotic people in his own life, and we move on to lighter news. Like Anne Hathoway trying to be Lil Wayne. Another round of Google Feud is also played.

Comedian Chris Wivell sits in for a mad-crazy riffin’ session where the topic of conversation is an in-depth exploration of crazy people, why Chris & Mitcz are addicted to insane situations, why Teddy avoids crazy people, whether life is meant to be Good or Interesting, and there’s stories galore. Strap in – this episode goes deep into the woods.

With Teddy out of town this week, comedian Justin Rupple comes in to riff with Mitcz. Justin and Mitcz talk about their “man date” on Saturday night, including Justin making Mitcz blush from a heaping of praise. The conversation moves towards a discussion about the attractiveness of performers, and what all men would ideally want in life. We discuss actresses who avoid nude scenes and how the digital age is tricking us, and lastly Mitcz tells a story that shocks Justin into silence. Not for the squeamish.

Our first female comedian Ashley Saint’Onge stops by the House of Riff to trade awkward moments and she managed to not curse even one single time (despite having been offered money to do so by her own father many times in her life). Some jabs are landed on every side of the table, and Mitcz trots out yet another example of terrible crap he went through to attract women.

A wonderful night of Riffin’ for all involved! This episode was mostly about women, dating, sex, and self-love. We felt great about how it turned out, and Jesse Case throws some AMAZING one-liners out there. At about 53 mins is a truly epic, in-depth fanboy discussion of Sex and the City.

Our friend and fellow comedian Josh Waldron stops by the Riffin’ Headquarters while we riff on things like A Capella Rammstein covers, two separate burglary stories involving sex and scorned women, a recent change in Louisiana law, another round of Google Feud and much more.

An instant classic and our biggest guest yet – Chris Reid, better known as “Kid” from the seminal rap group Kid N Play, sits down in the Riffin Studios to riff with Mitcz & Teddy. The conversation ranges from rap music, to a parody adult trailer to Mitcz feeling incredibly white and out of the loop, and about 1000 more subjects in between. If all you know of Chris is the House Party movies, you’re in for a surprise. He goes all OVER the place, and gets raw and uncensored in a way that that’ll amuse and shock you. Fun as hell, too. We riffed for over 5 hours (bonus content to come soon – SO much to edit), so this episode is more like a snippet.

On this special 4th of July episode, Mitcz unveils the official pipe of Straight Riffin and Teddy approves, there’s some brief discussion of The Notebook and its awkward love scenes, and the final hour is a State of the Union style discussion about modern-day America and your duty as a citizen.

Justin Rupple returned for a proper Straight Riffin’ episode, since we had issues last time. This time around, we cover everything from Creed and the ridiculousness of Scott Stapp to 70s-era ads in High Times to Gay Marriage being legalized in New York. Also, we discuss a hypothetical question about private fantasies, some disgusting goings-on at a Yoga festival, and a number of grim and/or serious political topics. Might be our least silly episode yet.

Maybe the funniest 20+ minutes of Straight Riffin we’ve ever had. Miss Crash suggests an awkward hypothetical surprise sex situation (basically… burglar sex), while Mitcz & Teddy loudly yell at each other about their alternate reactions to the situation.

The deviant, dangerous, ever-lovely Miss Crash came by the Straight Riffin’ studios to talk about her recent tour, some of her amazing fanmail, the importance of self-acceptance and more. We also discuss more crazy goings-on in Japan, the worst commercial ever, the unrequited romantic gesture of a Polish man, KFC’s misguided attempt to support diabetes research, an Indiana teen facing 8 years in prison for a weird prank… and, as usual, just 2 hours of pure insanity.

Mitcz tells a story about the time he worked the graveyard shift in Yorba Linda, CA and a meth head pulled a gun on him. Teddy calls him an idiot for not having a Gun City.

Our comedian friend Dan Frederickson swings through and what starts as a pretty normal episode, with another story of either the smartest or dumbest criminal ever then moves on to a discussion about teenage awkwardness and male anatomy. Insanity ensues.