Breaking Bread Podcast

Personal change can be so hard sometimes. We want to think differently and act differently. But we don’t. In this episode of Breaking Bread, three guests weigh in on the matter - a pastor, a psychologist, and a psychiatrist. Together, Jeff Waibel, Ted Witzig Jr. and Aaron Plattner explore the landscape of people change.

On divisive cultural topics like gender identity, sometimes we miss each other. Talking past each other. Unable to relate or understand with one another. To help with this understanding, Brian Sutter presents three lenses that capture three different “starting points” for the persuasions we hold. Show Notes: Mark Yarhouse in his book "Understanding Gender Dysphoria” presents three lenses through which we view the gender identity debate. By understanding these lenses, we will understand our persuasions and the persuasions of others better. Integrity Lens: “There is right and wrong in the world.” ·       Intent – The view of gender being created by God as either male or female. ·       Strength – This lens focuses on identifying what scripture says and holding closely to it. It fights for truth, right belief, and holy living by proclaiming truth even when it is contrary to culture. ·       Weakness – This lens can be cold, unloving, and judgmental. It can forget that sincere individuals can struggle with the

Today we are thinking more deeply about gender -maleness and femaleness. To help, Brian Sutter and Craig Stickling share their insights on this important matter. In this episode of Breaking Bread, we discuss biological sex and its outward expression in our gender. Show notes: Terminology is important. The words we use make a difference. Further, the meaning of the terms we use change. It is important we are informed on the definition of terms. Biological sex – The binary sex determination that occurs genetically and is coded by chromosomes. Those who have XX pairing are female and those who have XY pairing are male. Gender identity – How a person categorizes their felt gender experience. Gender dysphoria – The distress a person experiences when their felt gender identity does not match their biological sex assignment. Gender expression – How a person lives out their gender assignment. Gender roles – Expected rules, roles and experiences that we assume on being male or female. We live in a changing world. Ye

Parenting our children through the highs and lows of our technological world can be a challenge. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Craig Stickling provides us with four helps. He gives us one technology lesson to instruct our children in. He gives us one technology danger to protect our children from. He provides one issue that we should be able to engage our children about and he gives us one redeeming quality that technology offers our kids. Show Notes: Instructive: Help your kids understand that if you do not pay for the product, then you are the product. Every free app we use is earning money off of the user somehow. Often it is by advertisements. Protective: Sextortion is a growing concern. Young people are often targeted. A predator engages with them in a seemingly innocent way at first. This could be through direct messaging or otherwise. They lure the victim into taking a picture or video of themselves that they would not want the public to see. The predator then uses the image or video to blackma

Cognitive behavior therapy and EMDR are helpful tools in the clinical toolbox for treating complex trauma. In this audio recording, Kathy Knochel and Brian Sutter provide some wherewithal to what these are and other methods.

God asks us to participate in the life-giving care of people. Untangling the web trauma spins for those who have complex PTSD is one of those rewarding opportunities. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kathy Knochel and Brian Sutter take the discussion of complex trauma to the next level. They help us see what help looks like and gives us all a role to play. Show notes: Help for those with complex trauma can be understood in three phases: Phase 1: Safety and Stabilization Stabilize the victim and ensure their safety. Receive them on an emotional level. Help create for them a new safe experience that will over time help them construct a healthy meaning of their world. Phase 2: Processing Trauma Professionals in this phase can help create healthy meaning to old memories. Phase 3: Meaning Making and Reconnecting Help a victim engage in the world in a healthy way. Their difficult past does not bind them; rather it equips and provides value to their present.

Sometimes PTSD cannot be traced back to a single event. Rather, for a person with a web of traumatic events in their past and present, PTSD is a state of “normal”. It is the air they breathe. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kathy Knochel and Brian Sutter teach us what complex PTSD is. For those who want to live well with people, it is a concept that is good for us to understand. Show notes: Definition: Some people experience layers of trauma. Trauma on top of trauma produces an unhealthy stress whose root is not easy to isolate. In fact, a singular root does not exist. This is understood to be complex trauma. Sources: Complex trauma results from living conditions where safety is repeatedly jeopardized. Results: Complex trauma undermines a person’s sense of present safety. Traumatic living norms have produced in victims a skewed perception of others and themselves. Often relationships pay a heavy price among those who have experienced complex trauma.

God asks us to participate in the work of the Spirit in the lives of others.  “Go ye therefore and make disciples,” Jesus said. The local church just might be ground zero for this important work. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Arlan Miller and Matt Kaufmann outline 5 essentials for the community that will disciple. Below are five essentials for the community that will disciple: “Here I am.” Discipleship happens in a location. The community that disciples practices being present with people. “I am here.” Discipleship happens in communities where there is stability. The community that disciples is committed to each other. “I take you.” Discipleship requires vulnerability. The community that disciples receives one other. “Follow me as I follow Christ.” Discipleship is an active practice. The community that disciples is intentional. “I’ll walk with you.” Discipleship is a slow process that requires patience. The community that disciples is fueled by hope in Christ.

God has knit into our frame the capacity to have dominion. At some level, it comes from being an image bearer of his. Yet, it comes as no surprise, that after the fall, our capacity to have dominion has been bent. For the worse. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Brian Sutter and Kaleb Beyer address the tendency we have towards taking unhealthy control of situations. Wonderfully, letting go of control is possible, and who teaches it better than the Lord of Lords and King of Kings ~ Jesus. Show notes: I might have an unhealthy relationship with control if: I have an excessive need to be in-charge. I am slow to give responsibility to others. I am irritated when my plans are not followed. I ignore the boundaries of others. I don’t trust others. I think too highly of my opinions. I am impatient with others. I work better alone than with people. My desire for control might be fueled by the following reasons: Insecurity – my grasping for control soothes the discomfort I have in myself. Identity – my grasping for

Spiritual disciplines are often associated with the monastic life. This can be both helpful and unhelpful. Historian Fred Witzig, with the help of Isaac Funk, helps sort out the good from the bad as it regards practicing these disciplines. In the end, Fred and Isaac help cast an encouraging vision for practicing spiritual disciplines.

The practiced pianist, athlete, and mathematician share the commonality of making hard things look easy by way of practice. The same is true for the practicing Christian. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Isaac Funk and Fred Witzig help us understand what spiritual disciplines are and how they are helpful means to the end that we might be more like Christ.

Life is full of unpleasantness. With the unpleasantness we can’t change, we will need to endure through it. The skill of enduring this unpleasantness is patience. It is no wonder that patience is exhorted in Scripture. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kathy Knochel highlights this fruit of the Spirit and gives us some keys on how to be more patient. Show notes: Patience is being emotionally regulated while at the same time enduring unpleasantness. Patience is not necessarily marked by deactivation and calmness. Rather, it is actively engaging our emotional realities during these times of unpleasantness. Very often, our unhealthy emotional reactions to unpleasantness have less to do with the irritant we chafe against and more to do with our internal world. For example, a father may lose patience with his young son not because the son was disobedient but rather the father feels that the disobedience confirms that he is a bad father. The lack of patience with his son comes from internal unpleasantness. Pat

Like an athletic team running plays out of their playbook, we become skilled at running plays out of ours. However, those plays are not running or passing plays. Rather, they are intuitions- feelings and thoughts about people and the circumstances that confront us. Our reactions to these situations are so automatic, they operate in our subconscious. In these three episodes of Breaking Bread, Physician Keyna Martinez helps bring our playbook into our conscious awareness so we can learn, adjust and even correct our plays to match more closely with Christ’s. Show notes: Definition: Our “playbook” is our subconscious intuition that launches judgment and reaction. Importance: Our “playbook” is extremely important for life. Many of our decisions are made subconsciously. For example, we avoid danger by judging it as such and making necessary changes, often before we are fully aware of what is happening. How the playbook is made: Experience largely has constructed our internal playbooks. More specifically, painful ex

Like an athletic team running plays out of their playbook, we become skilled at running plays out of ours. However, those plays are not running or passing plays. Rather, they are intuitions- feelings and thoughts about people and the circumstances that confront us. Our reactions to these situations are so automatic, they operate in our subconscious. In these three episodes of Breaking Bread, Physician Keyna Martinez helps bring our playbook into our conscious awareness so we can learn, adjust and even correct our plays to match more closely with Christ’s. Show notes: Definition: Our “playbook” is our subconscious intuition that launches judgment and reaction. Importance: Our “playbook” is extremely important for life. Many of our decisions are made subconsciously. For example, we avoid danger by judging it as such and making necessary changes, often before we are fully aware of what is happening. How the playbook is made: Experience largely has constructed our internal playbooks. More specifically, painful ex

Like an athletic team running plays out of their playbook, we become skilled at running plays out of ours. However, those plays are not running or passing plays. Rather, they are intuitions- feelings and thoughts about people and the circumstances that confront us. Our reactions to these situations are so automatic, they operate in our subconscious. In these three episodes of Breaking Bread, Physician Keyna Martinez helps bring our playbook into our conscious awareness so we can learn, adjust and even correct our plays to match more closely with Christ’s. Show notes: Definition: Our “playbook” is our subconscious intuition that launches judgment and reaction. Importance: Our “playbook” is extremely important for life. Many of our decisions are made subconsciously. For example, we avoid danger by judging it as such and making necessary changes, often before we are fully aware of what is happening. How the playbook is made: Experience largely has constructed our internal playbooks. More specifically, painful ex

Tragedy comes to us unannounced. It is a shock in the human experience. The new and unwanted reality has a way of troubling us to the core. Yet hope can emerge if a community is present to care for the troubled. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Ted Witzig Jr. speaks to those in the caring community. There are some things to know about support in times of crisis that will prove helpful to the troubled. Show notes: Definition of tragedy: Tragedy is a sudden, shock inducing experience that launches us into a place crisis. Examples of tragedy: Natural disaster, unexpected loss, robbery, assault, accident Effects of tragedy: Tragedy undermines safety, security and the sense of control. It has a shocking effect in the human experience. Emotionally, tragedy causes grief, sadness, anxiety, and anger. Spiritually, tragedy can surface troubling questions of “why?”. Community Role in tragedy: Provide support and care for the troubled both in the short term and long term. To do this well, we must be aware of which phas

We do what we can to prevent our children from being exposed to pornography. But what if they do become exposed? First time exposure to porn can have long lasting effects on the young mind. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Brian Sutter and Jacob Feucht coach parents on the do’s and don’ts of engaging our children after exposure.  Show notes:   Consider the following tips if your child has a first time exposure to pornography.  What NOT to do:  Avoid shaming.   This can lead to isolation.  Avoid despair.   This can communicate to the child that irreparable damage has been done.  Avoid rage.   This can drive the issue underground and breakdown communication on the topic of sexuality.  Avoid ignoring.   This will not care for the trauma that has occurred and allow the behavior to go unchecked.  What TO do:  Receive the child in love.   This can prevent shame.  Receive the child with question.   This can give parents the ne

Difficult children demand a lot from parents. Wonderfully, easy children do not. Yet, the easy child should not be overlooked. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Craig Stickling reads a letter from an easy child to her parents. It helps us see the errors we can make when neglecting our easy ones. Moreover, the undue burden that can be placed on them unwittingly.   Show Notes:  Definition: Some children require a lot of parenting. Whether it is a streak of rebellion or special needs, these children might provide parents a unique challenge. We might understand them to be “difficult”.  Definition: Some children do not require a lot of parenting. Whether it is their resilience to respond well to adversity or their innate disposition to please people, these children do not deplete parenting bandwidth. We might understand them to be “easy”.  Problem statement: Parents can overlook the needs of their easy children.  Ill consequences:   The “easy” child’s identity can get unhealthily tied to their per

Marriages can find themselves in places of despair. Marriages often assume the problems are symptoms of waning affection. Yet what is actually present is neurodiversity. In this episode of Breaking Bread, Kaleb Beyer educates us on the impact ADHD can have on marriage relationships and the hope that can be breathed into a marriage when this is understood.   Show Notes:  What is neurodiversity?  The neurodiverse brain is contrasted with the neurotypical brain. The neurodiverse brain thinks, responds to its environment and interacts with emotions outside of the normative operating neurotypical brain. This condition is diagnosed, for example, as autistic, dyslexic, or ADHD (Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder).   What is ADHD?  ADHD stands for Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder. This is a diagnosable disorder. An individual with ADHD has the ability to hyperfocus. Often, they can be exciting, fun, creative, in the moment and flexible. Those with ADHD can struggle to prioritize

The new year carries a sense of hope for needed change. In this episode of Breaking Bread, the clinical staff from ACCFS share four words to help inspire and guide the changes we need to make.  These simple four verbs will be easy to remember and promise helpful practical action. Show Notes: Four simple action words that can motivate and guide positive change for our new year. Walk – Slowing down is necessary for us to live well. It puts us in a position to live mindfully. Cultivate – Fostering, encouraging, and nurturing growth. It puts us in a position where the next healthy step in progress is possible. Balance – Not all things equal, but all things in healthy proportion. It puts us in a position where we are investing in areas that matter most. Explore - Being curious and opening ourselves up to something new. It puts us in a position to grow our world and grow in our world.