Enslaved By The Bell

Actually some pretty good viewing this week .We meet Slater’s Army Dad and Belding’s a pretty nice guy. The show does an excellent job of selling the myth that young adolescent fellas should learn Shakespeare because it really impresses the ladies. Conall feels some kinship with Jessie Spano and recounts a bit of his youth.   Episodes: “Aloha Slater”, “The Substitute”

Characteristically late with their podcast, Rob and Conall desperately try to pull the wool over the eyes of their dwindling fans by recording an episode on Rob's laptop insetad of with the podcasting mic. Nevertheless fun is had as Zack reveals a penchant for World War II technology, Screech gets spider-sense and Rob's lovable dog Wallace chimes in with his thoughts on this week's episodes. 

Once again, the episode takes place from beyond the confines of the lonely studio as Rob is forced to give his input over the phone. Against all the expectations of the lads, this doesn't otherwise affect the professionalism and quality of the discussion as Rob and Conall discuss the ethics of Lisa and of Zack as they respectively play the ones closest to them for personal gain. It must be Sunday so.  Episodes: "The Lisa Card" and "Fatal Distraction"

Conall didn't quite make it to the studio this week, but joins us by a satellite mobile carphone connection to a public park on the other side of the city. The Bayside gang submit themselves to the horrors of the Clap-O-Meter, arousing some painful memories for Rob. Episode: "Dancing to the Max"

At last the lads cross the threshold into the hallowed halls of Bayside, leaving behind the shackles of Miss Bliss and her wretched Middle School. Here they meet the previously unheard of Jessie Spano, the uncomfortably sexualised Kelly Kapowski and the sudden Californian surroundings. And that isn't even taking into account the 5th Dimensional Wall-Breaking God Powers Zack now has. NOW we are Saved. Join us in the Halls.   Episode: "King of the Hill

At long last, the first leg of the lads' journey comes to a close as we leave John F. Kennedy Middleschool in a murky abyss of flame and ruin. What will happen to Heather Hopper? What cruel fate awaits Mylo? Will there be any redemption for Mikey or will he be left alone to wander the purgatory of forgotten preliminary-series characters? GOOD EVENING, MISS BLISS and Aloha Bayside. Episodes: "Clubs and Cliques" and "The Mentor"

It's a bleak outing for the two lads this week when the melancholy of rural Indiana finally takes its toll on Rob. The students of JFK middleschool are engaging in juvenile pranks against the teachers. All breaks loose when Rob gets his hand on a rogue cough sweet. Zack sexually harasses a pop star. Episodes: "Practical Jokes" and "Stevie"

JFK high is a circle of hell, ruled by the heinous Aryan devil-spawn that is Zack Morris. Some semblance of humanity in Good Morning Miss Bliss might yet be saved if our heroes Heather Hopper, Mylo and yer wan who plays Miss Bliss are kept on in the rapidly approaching Saved By The Bell. *crosses fingers* Episodes: "The Boy Who Cried Rat," "Let's Get Together"

The delicate eco-system that is JFK High is disrupted as fate sends Screech hurtling towards a showdown with The Punisher's little brother. Zack and Mikey have a falling out but then decide that women are to be treated as objects, and should be shared instead of fought over. Episodes: "Showdown" and "Save the Last Dance for Me"

The boys are deep into the crevices of Miss Bliss this week as they approach the coveted halfway mark. Technical difficulties restrict their ability to cover more than one episode, but stay tuned as the fourth episode isn't far off! Episode: "Parents and Teachers"

Things are looking up as the lads enjoy a marginal improvement in the quality of 'Good Morning, Miss Bliss!', but things are still very bleak with both episodes showcasing the dearth of humanity that exists in Zack Morris and Lisa Turtle, with only the true humanity of Samuel 'Screech' Powers and the social consciousness.     Episodes: "Wall Street" and "Leaping to Conclusions"

Two noble idiots begin their quest to catalogue and review every single episode of the entire 'Saved by the Bell' franchise. To their horror, they learn that their adventure doesn't begin in the sexy fantasy-land of Bayside California, but in the bleak chasm of death and despair that is rural Indiana... Episodes: "Summer Love", "Love Letters" ... and "Pilot"